Happiness is a gradual progression in my life. Lots of small moments will make up the whole. I am anxious for the future and patient with present. I know there is no "right" way to do any of this, I'm not trying to please anyone in the process.
If my choices don't seem to please everyone, I don't really care. I don't have a "type". If you limit yourself to only the men who look a certain way or dress a certain way there is always the possibility of you missing out seeing their heart. I am at a point in my life where I may have found someone who makes me happy. We don't have to necessarily see each other everyday or talk to each other everyday to know we are thinking of each other.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
My superman
What I wouldn't give right now to replay Sunday morning...to be held again by someone who cares for me, kissed on the forehead as though I meant more to them than anyone else.
I don't know what it is, is he too shy, maybe he doesn't have enough courage to call me back. For goodness sakes he gave me HIS phone number. So I am not understanding.
13 years is a long time to have the impression someone doesn't like you and in the matter of a couple hours have that do a TOTAL 180 and your high school crush be into you. It took me a couple days just to come to the realization that what happened the things that were said....were really said. I believe in Karma with all my heart, and I finally believe that its some what my turn now. I hoped it wouldn't end with Sunday but it seems as though it might have.
I kept my hope grounded, I didn't work myself up. I did however dream about it, while we were in the moments as I usually do. I am SUCH a dreamer, I spend most of my day dreaming about things that may or may not happen. I believe my Feng Shui is working.
He will call he has to, I mean he has to. I am a great girl, a lonely girl but a great one. I am so loyal it is usually a fault that ends up hurting me in the end. I want to fall in love so bad, and I know that is hard for some to believe but its true. What happened Sunday was unbelievable, it just felt right.
I don't know what it is, is he too shy, maybe he doesn't have enough courage to call me back. For goodness sakes he gave me HIS phone number. So I am not understanding.
13 years is a long time to have the impression someone doesn't like you and in the matter of a couple hours have that do a TOTAL 180 and your high school crush be into you. It took me a couple days just to come to the realization that what happened the things that were said....were really said. I believe in Karma with all my heart, and I finally believe that its some what my turn now. I hoped it wouldn't end with Sunday but it seems as though it might have.
I kept my hope grounded, I didn't work myself up. I did however dream about it, while we were in the moments as I usually do. I am SUCH a dreamer, I spend most of my day dreaming about things that may or may not happen. I believe my Feng Shui is working.
He will call he has to, I mean he has to. I am a great girl, a lonely girl but a great one. I am so loyal it is usually a fault that ends up hurting me in the end. I want to fall in love so bad, and I know that is hard for some to believe but its true. What happened Sunday was unbelievable, it just felt right.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Ferris Wheel Day
No one reads this, so no one will care to know this is the 8th consecutive Valentines Day I have not had a man to share it with. Pathetic. I wasn't alone on this holiday, I did spend it with Christopher, Mandy and her kids. We went bowling then out to Applebee's. Needless to say, a few young couples had a brief glimpse of life if they don't use procaution tonight! LOL!
I wonder when my time will come, when I will find that someone.
I wonder when my time will come, when I will find that someone.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
What it means
Entrepreneur - A risk-taker who has the skills and initiative to establish a business.
The fruits of my labor and self taugh skills will shine through. Nothing is going to stop me. I bought a magazine today "Entrepreneur". I am sharing my goal with some and not others...."others" being my mother and naysayers. Even though nothing is going to stop me from doing this, I just prefer to avoid bumps in the road when possible.
I am taking online classes through www.sba.gov if you know me then you know they are free lol.
Once I have a somewhat basic outline of a business plan I am going to go to seek out help at UNIcue. I don't want to go into this without knowing EVER angle of the business I want to create. When I propose it, I want to be so confident in myself and my plan that there won't be a soul in sight that won't be behind me when I am finished.
It's taken me 28 years to figure out what it is I am supposed to do, and in the matter of a day something hit me and I had the vision. I don't know the exact moment but I know it was last week. I recognized that our city is lacking something and fully intend to do what I can to provide this community with a service our children and parents so dearly need.
Hi Ho Silver, nothing will stop me!
The fruits of my labor and self taugh skills will shine through. Nothing is going to stop me. I bought a magazine today "Entrepreneur". I am sharing my goal with some and not others...."others" being my mother and naysayers. Even though nothing is going to stop me from doing this, I just prefer to avoid bumps in the road when possible.
I am taking online classes through www.sba.gov if you know me then you know they are free lol.
Once I have a somewhat basic outline of a business plan I am going to go to seek out help at UNIcue. I don't want to go into this without knowing EVER angle of the business I want to create. When I propose it, I want to be so confident in myself and my plan that there won't be a soul in sight that won't be behind me when I am finished.
It's taken me 28 years to figure out what it is I am supposed to do, and in the matter of a day something hit me and I had the vision. I don't know the exact moment but I know it was last week. I recognized that our city is lacking something and fully intend to do what I can to provide this community with a service our children and parents so dearly need.
Hi Ho Silver, nothing will stop me!
Thursday, February 5, 2009
A world of color
I had a sort of epiphany when I came home from work I decided even though I didn't feel well I was going to rearrange the entire living room. In doing so I went to move the entertainment center into the corner. I looked at the corner and after 6 years of being surrounded by white plaster walls I decided that corner was horrible looking and I needed to paint the entire living room.
It is absolutely AMAZING what a coat of paint can do for a house. I mean I loved my house before, but after putting a coat in the living room of my made up brown color. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my house like the day I first saw it but better.
Don't worry I'm not just stopping at my living room....NOOOOO I am ON to something now...next comes the dining room....PURPLE!!!! I can't wait!!!
Who knew, painting....what a concept!
It is absolutely AMAZING what a coat of paint can do for a house. I mean I loved my house before, but after putting a coat in the living room of my made up brown color. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my house like the day I first saw it but better.
Don't worry I'm not just stopping at my living room....NOOOOO I am ON to something now...next comes the dining room....PURPLE!!!! I can't wait!!!
Who knew, painting....what a concept!
Monday, January 26, 2009
Body day ONE
So today was the first day of the Body for Life program. I have to say not too shabby I lifted a lot more than I expected, suprised myself. One day at a time and before I know it BAAADOW I will be a hottie again! Well my version of a hottie, watch out!
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Marshmellows and Beaches
I need to resist more marshmellows and in the mean time I have commited to the Virginia Beach Rock and Roll marathon on 9/6/09...this time I WILL do it in less than 7 hours!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Guilt???
Ok so my mother thinks I should feel guilty for not working full time now that Christopher is in school. She claims I am using the system, and to an extent I am. HOWEVER, I know I would feel MORE guilty if I got a full time job that I hated, just to have one. Which would ultimately affect Christopher.
I could potentially work full time at Grainger...I could also rip my eyeballs out with no anestetic and that would be less painful.
If there is one thing I could have changed in my past is that my mother spent more time with me. So NO I don't feel guilty for using the system for a little while. I NEVER got to see my mother, she worked like 90 hours a week. So at least I can say I am spending PLENTY of time with my mini me.
I could potentially work full time at Grainger...I could also rip my eyeballs out with no anestetic and that would be less painful.
If there is one thing I could have changed in my past is that my mother spent more time with me. So NO I don't feel guilty for using the system for a little while. I NEVER got to see my mother, she worked like 90 hours a week. So at least I can say I am spending PLENTY of time with my mini me.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Overly Opinionated
Well somehow, out of like TWO HUNDRED people I was picked to be on a jury of 13 people, yay me. I literally had to hold my eyes open most of the day. With my ADD, I'm thinking this probably wasn't a wise choice on anyones part. All I can say is this better not last another day, it should have never went to trial it is absolutely absurd. Waste of state money and citizens time.
Figures I would get picked for a jury with only 3 hours of sleep since coming back from Phoenix. Gail is still in shock that anyone would put me the "overly opinionated" on a jury.
Figures I would get picked for a jury with only 3 hours of sleep since coming back from Phoenix. Gail is still in shock that anyone would put me the "overly opinionated" on a jury.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Warm weather is nice but home is still Iowa
Call it want you want but I was humored by the fact on the flight here to Arizona the man on the other side of Mike was reading a book called "Meeting God again for the first time" while I was a Tucker Max book. Specifically the chapter "Blowjob Follies" I found wonderful humor in this irony.
So we are in Phoenix, Arizona. Gorgeous weather here, but crazy as it sounds I am totally ready to go home to Iowa. The city is definately not the place for me. Plus this posh Sheraton hotel we are in....sucks. The sheets are so loud they wake you up and they charge $12.95 for 24 hours of internet in your room! Unless you want to hightail it down to the "link cafe" THEN its free. I mean this is a $200 a night hotel, I'm thinking the internet should be free. Then again I am from Iowa, everything is cheap.
So the results are in, Mike finished his FIRST marathon in 5 hours and 55 minutes! I did the half in 4 hours 39 minutes....I mean it take REAL skill to manage to be one of the LAST 4 people to cross the finish line. At least I don't THINK I was the last person to cross. I could very well be if the others hopped in the van and copped out.
Not that I care what my time was but for arguments sake I will let you know WHY it took me so long. At about mile .5 I saw a girl walking by herself like me, that had about the same length of legs and looked about my pace. So you know me, I befriended her. Her name was Franchesca (I am sure the spelling is wrong). Come to find out her friend called her at 4am that morning and said she wouldn't be participating. So she was a alone, 20 years old, first time doing anything like this, and 3 months pregnant. When I found that out my unwavering loyalty kicked in and there was no way I was going to leave her, no matter what!
We had a great time talking, she was from the Phoenix area and we had lots to discuss since we had never met before. Neither of us could drink the water they were giving out on the route. So we stopped at a gas station. Around mile 10 she wasn't looking so good and asked her if she really thought she could make it. At that point the police escort that was literally 5 feet behind us. She was pale and I made the decision that she really needed to get a ride and end it. Plus she felt dizzy. I made the officer stop and call for a ride for her. I stuck with her until I knew she was safe on the shuttle, I wished her well and told her that the name Christopher that she picked out for her son was MORE than a perfect name! I plan on using my investigative skills to find her.
Needless to say at about mile 10.5 I started to book it and the police officer wished me well and told me I was a good person for sticking with her. I told him I liked him but I was tired of being followed by him and someone else could be the last person that he is followed. I passed many people & eventually made it to the finish line, where I was greeted with the knowledge I would not get a medal, because they ran out. Figures. The will supposedly mail me one.
Well Iowa here I come, flight leaves at 5:30 can't wait! I miss my Christopher!
So we are in Phoenix, Arizona. Gorgeous weather here, but crazy as it sounds I am totally ready to go home to Iowa. The city is definately not the place for me. Plus this posh Sheraton hotel we are in....sucks. The sheets are so loud they wake you up and they charge $12.95 for 24 hours of internet in your room! Unless you want to hightail it down to the "link cafe" THEN its free. I mean this is a $200 a night hotel, I'm thinking the internet should be free. Then again I am from Iowa, everything is cheap.
So the results are in, Mike finished his FIRST marathon in 5 hours and 55 minutes! I did the half in 4 hours 39 minutes....I mean it take REAL skill to manage to be one of the LAST 4 people to cross the finish line. At least I don't THINK I was the last person to cross. I could very well be if the others hopped in the van and copped out.
Not that I care what my time was but for arguments sake I will let you know WHY it took me so long. At about mile .5 I saw a girl walking by herself like me, that had about the same length of legs and looked about my pace. So you know me, I befriended her. Her name was Franchesca (I am sure the spelling is wrong). Come to find out her friend called her at 4am that morning and said she wouldn't be participating. So she was a alone, 20 years old, first time doing anything like this, and 3 months pregnant. When I found that out my unwavering loyalty kicked in and there was no way I was going to leave her, no matter what!
We had a great time talking, she was from the Phoenix area and we had lots to discuss since we had never met before. Neither of us could drink the water they were giving out on the route. So we stopped at a gas station. Around mile 10 she wasn't looking so good and asked her if she really thought she could make it. At that point the police escort that was literally 5 feet behind us. She was pale and I made the decision that she really needed to get a ride and end it. Plus she felt dizzy. I made the officer stop and call for a ride for her. I stuck with her until I knew she was safe on the shuttle, I wished her well and told her that the name Christopher that she picked out for her son was MORE than a perfect name! I plan on using my investigative skills to find her.
Needless to say at about mile 10.5 I started to book it and the police officer wished me well and told me I was a good person for sticking with her. I told him I liked him but I was tired of being followed by him and someone else could be the last person that he is followed. I passed many people & eventually made it to the finish line, where I was greeted with the knowledge I would not get a medal, because they ran out. Figures. The will supposedly mail me one.
Well Iowa here I come, flight leaves at 5:30 can't wait! I miss my Christopher!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Body for Life
So I read Body for Life last night. I am going to attempt this 12 week program. I went to www.bodyforlife.com and I printed out all the workout plans. The one thing I hope to get out of this is some nice looking arms.
You wouldn't know it but I am SUPER self-concious of my arms. I have an ass bigger than a double wide but its my arms that I dislike the most. So I am going to attempt this an incorporate it into the other things I am currently doing. Kickboxing will still stay on the schedule for MWF, I might knock it down to two days a week.
You wouldn't know it but I am SUPER self-concious of my arms. I have an ass bigger than a double wide but its my arms that I dislike the most. So I am going to attempt this an incorporate it into the other things I am currently doing. Kickboxing will still stay on the schedule for MWF, I might knock it down to two days a week.
You can't really argue with proof like this. I will WAIT on putting my before picture up until around July when I can post my after at the same time. LOL!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
I'm not a 9-5 type girl
As many of you know I am not your average person. I have no desire to climb the ladder, dominate the corporate world or even work full time. Then again I have yet to find my calling.
I have been struggling with this idea I've had for a long time. I think I need to ask my mom for help in making it happen. I know its going to cost a lot of money, and take a LOT of convincing to a financial institution (that isn't the brick wall). The brick wall is deciding whether or not I want to actually work with my mother or attempt to do it all on my own.
I've worked with her, for her and near her. None of which is EVER pleasant. I pains me to admit this but we are WAY too much alike. However, she has a huge issue with giving up control. When she is at my house and food is involved you might as well just know I am kicked out of my own kitchen.
I have been thinking a LOT about this little (well not so little) business ventrure. The more and more I realize I'm probably not going to win the lottery I realize I am going to have to borrow money. My idea will be a HUGE HUGE HUGE addition to the Cedar Valley and I have NO doubt it will create PLENTY of revenue (even in this shitty economy).
So I will end it with this, I am doing things to prepare myself to do it on my own. I know will always have the help of my few but close friends who possess BA's and Masters in busniess and experience in accounting. THANK GOODNESS! LOL!
I have been struggling with this idea I've had for a long time. I think I need to ask my mom for help in making it happen. I know its going to cost a lot of money, and take a LOT of convincing to a financial institution (that isn't the brick wall). The brick wall is deciding whether or not I want to actually work with my mother or attempt to do it all on my own.
I've worked with her, for her and near her. None of which is EVER pleasant. I pains me to admit this but we are WAY too much alike. However, she has a huge issue with giving up control. When she is at my house and food is involved you might as well just know I am kicked out of my own kitchen.
I have been thinking a LOT about this little (well not so little) business ventrure. The more and more I realize I'm probably not going to win the lottery I realize I am going to have to borrow money. My idea will be a HUGE HUGE HUGE addition to the Cedar Valley and I have NO doubt it will create PLENTY of revenue (even in this shitty economy).
So I will end it with this, I am doing things to prepare myself to do it on my own. I know will always have the help of my few but close friends who possess BA's and Masters in busniess and experience in accounting. THANK GOODNESS! LOL!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Please VOTE
I am creating my own website so that potential employers can view my information and see a little about me outside of the paper resume they might receive. However, I need some assistance in picking a URL for it, here is what I have thought of so far. If you have any other suggestions feel free to let me know. I am looking for something SHORT, CATCHY and nothing with numbers or Hyphens. I'm not really fond of .nets but if I find the right catchy URL I am willing to compromise. I am using www.nameboy.com to search for unused URLs.
www.hiremeiowa.com
www.letmeworkforyou.net
www.iowahireme.com
www.idealemployee.net
www.constuctionchick.com
www.constructiongirls.com (which I know I am only ONE girl)
www.needacareer.net
www.mydreamcareer.net
Ok I am out of ideas for the day. Let me know what you think!
www.hiremeiowa.com
www.letmeworkforyou.net
www.iowahireme.com
www.idealemployee.net
www.constuctionchick.com
www.constructiongirls.com (which I know I am only ONE girl)
www.needacareer.net
www.mydreamcareer.net
Ok I am out of ideas for the day. Let me know what you think!
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Starting the year backwards
This year I am starting things off a little backwards....with a marathon that I am not fully prepared for. Even though I am completely out of shape, I am sure I can finish it...its all mental anyway. Once you start you really don't have a choice but to finish. Plus I think Michael won't let me get the tattoo if I don't finish. It will be my rendition of the picture above. It won't be exactly like that, but similar, just haven't decided on a color. THat is what I am most excited for!
What I am not looking forward to is crying at the Pasta Dinner...its going to happen I already warned Michael. I cry like 3 times a year might as well get one right out the gate.
I am the ultimate mapper, not so much planner so I have the whole city mapped out. What sucks is our schedule while we are there:
Friday 1/16 3am leave Waterloo (soooo not looking forward to this)
5am flight leaves CR
9:30am arrive in Phoenix
(roam around the city for 6 hours, I really have NO plans because I
have NO money, so its really up to Michael all I will want to do is
take a nap)
3pm check in at hotel
Saturday 1/17
The whole day nothing to do.
5pm Pasta Dinner
Sunday 1/18
5am wake up
7:40am marathon starts
***I am a little concerned with this late start time, as it is going to
take me over 7 hours to finish, I would like to be done before the
sun sets.
8am I will actually GET to the start line
**INTERRUPTION**
It is official I am doing the HALF marathon. Just found out there is a 7 hour time limit on the marathon...yeah I finished my last one in 7:19:43...and I was in GREAT shape then. Why they let me register for longer than that is beyond me. Most marathons have an 8 hour time limit.
This is great though because I will be able to take pictures of Mike crossing the finish line!!!
3pm TATTOOS!!!!
6:30pm Victory Party
Monday 1/19
11am check out of hotel
5:35pm flight leaves Phoenix
11:25pm get into CR
1am get to Waterloo THEN jury duty at 8am yay!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Breakdown of a Durcell commercial
Christopher amazes me in such ways it is hard to realize somedays he is only 5 years old. He soaks in much much more than I ever have.
Today we were watching TV and an Duracell commercial came on
Christopher was immediately concerned why Kevin would even think of walking into the woods to get a balloon, then he wanted to know why there was a park in the woods. He also noticed Kevin didn't ask his mom for any money and he came back with a balloon, I mean who just give a kid a balloon and Kevin didn't ask his mom if he could go anywhere....this all gathered from a 30 second commercial.
My reaction from the commercial was a bit different, I wanted to know what the hell type of thing this brickhouse locator was...was it a chip in the kids neck or what? Kevin didn't have any necklace on, where the hell is the locator. And why the hell they showed a creepy child molster van driving away.
Christopher gathered this kid was about to get his ass whooped because he knows if ever walked away from me there would be consequences, then he was shocked to see Kevin got a hug from his mom. Christopher looked at me and said "man there is something wrong with that mom, Kevin ran away and now his mom is hugging him?"
I couldn't help but laugh, then with big eyes Christopher says "You wouldn't be hugging me! You would take me home and let the balloon fly in the air!"
You're darn right kiddo! Goes to show you, the different type of parenting styles there are. LOL! We had a 10 minute conversation off of a 30 second commercial, that eventually lead us to calling Grandma and joining her in on it, because Christopher just could not believe this kid was walking in the woods without his mom.
Today we were watching TV and an Duracell commercial came on
Christopher was immediately concerned why Kevin would even think of walking into the woods to get a balloon, then he wanted to know why there was a park in the woods. He also noticed Kevin didn't ask his mom for any money and he came back with a balloon, I mean who just give a kid a balloon and Kevin didn't ask his mom if he could go anywhere....this all gathered from a 30 second commercial.
My reaction from the commercial was a bit different, I wanted to know what the hell type of thing this brickhouse locator was...was it a chip in the kids neck or what? Kevin didn't have any necklace on, where the hell is the locator. And why the hell they showed a creepy child molster van driving away.
Christopher gathered this kid was about to get his ass whooped because he knows if ever walked away from me there would be consequences, then he was shocked to see Kevin got a hug from his mom. Christopher looked at me and said "man there is something wrong with that mom, Kevin ran away and now his mom is hugging him?"
I couldn't help but laugh, then with big eyes Christopher says "You wouldn't be hugging me! You would take me home and let the balloon fly in the air!"
You're darn right kiddo! Goes to show you, the different type of parenting styles there are. LOL! We had a 10 minute conversation off of a 30 second commercial, that eventually lead us to calling Grandma and joining her in on it, because Christopher just could not believe this kid was walking in the woods without his mom.
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